When you want to get your point across to someone, you need more than just the right words or the right methodologies. What you need are the secrets that separate the successful from the not so successful. Here are seven such secrets that you can use today.
Start in the positive
While you might not believe that your persuasion is going to work with your partner or business associate, you should try. When you start to change your mindset of the outcome, it can produce small changes in the way that you present your case that will make the difference. Try to think about your conversation all the way through to the end and see yourself making your point clearly and strongly. When and if the conversation starts to veer into negative thinking, try to reverse the language to be more positive. This keeps everyone in the positive mindset.
Plan ahead
Those that are pros in persuasion always take the time to plan ahead. They realize that since they only know their side of the conversation, they need to be ready for whatever the other side is offering. Taking the time to research their position, its weaknesses, and its strengths helps in any form of persuasion. Knowing what you may have to convince someone of is the best way to ensure that you will be able to persuade someone. Try to think of questions that they might ask and points that might cause contention.
Look at the professionals
There are hundreds of persuasion resources available for you to use books, audio tapes, classes, Internet sites, etc. But are you taking advantage of them? When you start to look at the professionals, you may be able to see what makes them so good at persuasion and how you can use that to your advantage. Try to take a class in sales in order to get a non-emotional viewpoint of persuasion as well as learn how to use the skills in your current job even if youre not in sales.
Put yourself in the others shoes
One of the best ways to be sure that youre considering all of the sides of a subject is to see what the other person will see. Try to consider what they might find wrong with your logic as well as what they might find right about it. If you start to consider their attitudes and motivations, you will start to be able to persuade them with this information. If youre having troubles finding out what the other person believes, its best to just ask them in order to understand them more fully.
The right place
When you want to persuade someone into anything, you need to choose the right location. Too many times people think that where you talk isnt as important as what you are talking about and while this is partly true, if youre already put on the defensive by the location, you certainly wont have a receptive audience. What you want to do is choose a location that is neutral for the both of you somewhere public that is also private is best. This keeps tempers even and creates a time limitation for your conversation.
Stay on track
If you want to genuinely have someone see your side of a situation, you need to make sure that this is the only topic that you are discussing. Sometimes when someone else does not agree with you, but doesnt want to say anything, they will try to veer from the subject. You need to be sure to gently bring them back to the topic so that they have to face the conversation at hand.
Try to make it work for both of you
Persuasion really isnt about someone winning or losing the conversation its about coming to an understanding about something so that both people get something from the conversation. In order to make persuasion work, you need to acknowledge each others needs and how to properly address them, continuing the conversation until everyone is happy.
Realize that persuasion only works if youre willing to create a level playing field upon which everyones ideas and feelings are acknowledged especially when youre in a relationship. You both want to work things out to your advantage, right? |
